BLAMMO! I'm back! Guess where I bin all day? That#s right shipmates, I bin in the pb! This is a pictur of my local, The KIngs Head, the only pub in the North london area that allows me to park my horse and cart which I won in a fair fight with a romany chap back in '05. His name is Wayne! He likes apples and biting people under five foot tall.

so, im in the boozer and i was waiting for the cubeicle in the bog to empty, there was a commotion in there, I didn#t want to get involved. then this geeezer says 'hello mate' and I turn round and its only that farkin bloke who does the show with the people. whats it. family fortunes, vernon somink. anyway, he's not talking to me hes talking to some bloke with la-de-da hair and I think #YES! YES! GET IN THER! so i run out to wayne and get my sitcom scripp out of my saddlebag and a run back and i say 'oi ponce, hows about this then?# and this vernon goes 'is that a scrip?' and I'm like 'YES!' and he#s like 'oh sorry, im busy' and thAts when I hit him with the chair.

so i have to leeve cos apparantley hitting people with chairs is not good now the pubs gone all gentrifyed and serves olives not crisps so I got back on the cart and came home.

and i never even got to use the cubeicle! LOL!

I hope familly fotunes gets axed and vernon falls down a hole.

bye.